


(when you turn out the lights, i get) stars in my eyes

by gotsarang



Series: (and i'll be your) love song [3]
Category: GOT7, JJ Project
Genre: M/M, a touch more angsty than the previous one, because it the truth, but jinyoung changes the game for him, he just likes sex, jaebum is a not a player, jinyoung is the most beautiful boy jaebum has met, more like in the entire world
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-31
Updated: 2017-05-31
Packaged: 2018-11-07 06:18:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11053068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gotsarang/pseuds/gotsarang
Summary: JB is fire, but Jinyoung is ice that refuses to turn to water.





	(when you turn out the lights, i get) stars in my eyes

**Author's Note:**

  * For [littlescallion](https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlescallion/gifts), [riveting](https://archiveofourown.org/users/riveting/gifts).



> Give You What You Like - Avril Lavigne
> 
> unbeta-ed, nonchronology, shifting pov, mention of alcohol, sex scenes
> 
> for dea and jia

Jinyoung curses softly to himself as slips quietly out of bedroom, the door barely making a sound save for the click of the doorknob.

 

He should really stop this. He's only hurting himself just because he was a little greedy and desperate.

 

He was sure he could do better than JB. He's also sure that's the biggest lie he's ever told himself apart from the one he had been tell himself when this started, the one he had prayed would come to be the truth.

 

(JB can learn to love me. He thought as he left JB slumbering, alcohol saturated in his bloodstream and completely naked in someone else's bed.)

 

\---

 

_Don't turn on the lights._

 

So JB complies.

 

JB lays him down on the bed, arms tense and trembling. Jinyoung bites his lip, embarrassed that JB is having a hard time carrying him.

 

His body is hovering over him. The heat between them is overwhelming,burning right through their clothing, and in the darkened room, Jinyoung thinks he can see all the stars (the entire galaxy, even) in JB's eyes.

 

 

\---

 

 

The sheets are warm and so is JB's breath, but he can't help but go rigid as soon as JB's fingertips make contact with his damp skin. He can't see JB's face, but he knows there's a frown marring his sharply handsome face. There's an imperceptible pause after, before JB's palms slide down to grip his waist.

 

It feels like an eternity to Jinyoung.

 

He would love nothing more than to melt into JB's touch, to give in and, go soft and compliant but he needs his wits about him everytime he is with JB. One little slip and he might be spilling his heart on the bed and unto the floor.

 

As soon as JB thinks Jinyoung has stopped resisting to him, he knows he'll abandon him. Move on to the next pretty thing that catches his eye.

 

And Jinyoung can't have that. He wants JB to himself for as long as he possibly can.

 

Jinyoung is pretty, too...pretty fucked up, that is. And so is this entire situation, Reverse Psychology 101. It's worked so many times before that he can't write it off as coincidence anymore.

 

 

The only thing he's scared of is if stops working on JB.

 

\---

 

Jinyoung finds himself held to JB's chest and strong sinewy arms wrapped around his waist. The older male's breath is tickling his ear but instead of his steady heartbeat calming him down, Jinyoung is high-strung on the desire to escape.

 

 

He shifts a little, starting his attempt to slip away undetected, loosening his elbow and picking up JB's wrist to free himself.

 

Shit. he thinks as JB's grip tightens on him, as if the older male subconsciously knew he was trying to run away.

 

HIs resolve breaks a little at the thought, he lets himself fantasize a bit. JB wanting him to stay, wanting him without the sex, just holding him and kissing him without the numbness of alcohol. Then he decides to make the most of it, turning around the face the sleeping man. JB is shaken from his slumber and looks at Jinyoung with a warm sleepy smile, it would be a lie to say Jinyoung's heart didn't melt at the sight. Jinyoung lets his head rest on JB's chest and tries to relax in his embrace.

 

When would be the next time he'd get to be with JB again? Somehow, JB was still playing into his little game, he still kept meeting Jinyoung and taking him to bed with him. But Jinyoung still can't help but feel that the next time will always be the last time because JB has grown tired of him.

 

Jinyoung's last thought before sleeps takes him is hoping that he won't break like glass when JB drops him on the floor.

 

 

\---

 

 

The next time he attends a party, Jinyoung gets cornered by JB in almost the same way he got roped into bed with him the first time--the older male is stumbling drunk and telling him he's the most beautiful boy he's ever laid his eyes on.

 

This must be how he gets the pretty little things with him, Jinyoung thinks. He tells himself not to be flattered, he's nothing special to JB--just a new notch on his bedpost, and that the brightness in JB's eyes as his gaze roves over Jinyoung's face was just an illusion brought about by flashing lights and alcohol shot through their systems.

 

 

In some other life, JB would be his, and he would belong to the other boy as just as much, if not even more. But this is this timeline, and JB belongs to the night, a name to the nameless, countless faces he has shared his body with.

 

 

And Jinyoung, as shameful aa the desire is, wants to be in the list of those pretty little things with no names, just for a little more time with JB.

 

 

So for tonight, he swallows his pride, gives in to his desires and believes JB's sweet little lies.

 

 

\---

 

 

Jinyoung lies still as Jaebum pulls out of him and disposes of the condom carelessly.

 

He makes no move when Jaebum reaches out and presses his mouth to Jinyoung's, hoping that it will warm up the boy's frozen exterior toward him. His lips are cold, and so are his limbs, Jaebum rubs warm palms to Jinyoung's clammy skin.

 

He kisses Jinyoung some more, mouth hot and giving, giving, giving--he doesn't want to take. Jinyoung is a boy he wants to be better for, to be showing affection to and be adoring to.

 

Let me show you. Let me-

 

Jaebum is horrified when Jinyoung promptly bursts into tears and pushes him away. He is still in shock, unable to stop Jinyoung from tugging on his jeans and shirt, slipping away with dirty boots in hand. The slamming of doors that Jinyoung leaves in his wake reverberate through the house and up Jaebum's spine.

 

What did I do wrong?

 

\---

 

The next time, Jaebum manages to get Jinyoung alone, he's more cautious. Jinyoung is as skittish as a deer and can move like a cat, he does want him to run off and slip out of his grasp again.

 

To his amazement, Jinyoung readily accepts his invitation once more and he finds himself savoring the moment. He tries his hardest to not to rush, gently slipping his palms from Jinyoung's waist and up his back, drawing circles on his skin to keep the younger boy calm.

 

Jinyoung sighs as Jaebum pulls back and takes off his shirt, gasping when Jaebum moves to remove his clothes. Long pale thighs wrap around Jaebum's waist after his pants are peeled off of him. Jaebum squeezes his ass, it feels so good to Jinyoung, so he lets a moan escape his mouth while Jaebum trails kisses from his chest to the curve of his jaw.

 

Jinyoung keeps still as Jaebum's moist breath ghosts along his neck and reaches his cheeks, but suddenly he turns his face away just when Jaebum is leaning towards his mouth. Jaebum feels blood rush to his ears and skin, hurt and humiliated by the rejection. He pulls back, not bothering to conceal his discomfort.

 

"You can do anything to me," Jinyoung murmurs quietly while pressing blunt nails on his shoulder. "just...no kissing. Okay?"

 

 

"Okay." Jaebum mumbles into his ear, keeping his mouth as far away from Jinyoung's skin and Jinyoung nearly takes back his request.

 

 

"I still want your lips on me," Jinyoung finally admits, after a few moments of frustration over Jaebum's touch alone. He traces the indents of the other's clavicle as he speaks, making him take a sharp breath. "...just not on my own."

 

Jaebum lets himself be appeased a little and replaces his hot hot hot mouth where his fingers had just made contact, making purple blossoms bloom on his pale creamy skin and soothing the sting with a slide of his tongue.

 

\---

 

 

Jaebum feels like he's being shaken awake by someone trying to get out of his bed. His stomach sinks when he realizes it's Jinyoung sneaking away after sex again. But then Jinyoung's face is suddenly close to his own and Jaebum is too stunned to do anything but grin sleepily to convey his happiness.

 

 

Jinyoung places his head against his chest and it takes a while but eventually he relaxes into him, Jaebum shifts to accommodate him, tucking him deeper under his chin. 

 

 

 

It's cliche, it's cheesy. But all Jaebum ever really wants is this moment to last forever.

 

 

Alas, not all wishes can come true.

 

 

\---

 

 

Jinyoung wants to fall apart, wants to let go.

 

But he stays rigid as if paralyzed, even when JB whispers his name in what he'd like to imagine is adoration (or heaven forbid, fondness). He doesn't what to show how vulnerable he is when it comes to JB.

 

 

 

JB is fire, but Jinyoung is ice that refuses to turn to water.

 

\---

 

 

From: Unknown Number

Hello.  
-Im Jaebum

 

To: Unknown Number

Who is this and how did you get my number?

 

 

From: Unknown Number

It's me, JB. I got it from Kim Wonpil.

 

 

Jinyoung frowns and deletes the conversation, tucking his phone back into his pocket and goes back to reading his notes. But he still can't stop thinking about JB.

 

What did JB want with him?

 

\---

 

Jaebum's heart sinks as he watches Jinyoung frown and put his phone away. He doesn't look back as he slowly makes his way back to his apartment.

 

 

Why did I ever think he would want to talk to me?

 

\---

 

Jaebum wakes up alone for what seems to be the hundredth time since starting this thing with Jinyoung. His head hurts but his heart screams at him to notice it.

 

Everything seems to be crashing down around him. He feels awful, sick with the knowledge that his worst fear is a reality.

 

Jinyoung never loved him. He never meant anything to the younger boy.

 

 

 

Jaebum holds his knees closer in an attempt to warm the chill in his chest, and finally, finally, gives in to his tears.

 

 

\---

 

 

_Don't turn on the lights._

 

Because that's what Jinyoung wants.

 

Jaebum lays him down gently on the bed, careful not to crush him accidentally.

 

 

His body is hovering over him. The heat is overwhelming, burning right through their clothing, and in the darkened room, Jaebum thinks he can see all the stars in Jinyoung's eyes.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know if you guys are aware of my writing style, but i will point out that i aam not very detailed nor to i write amazing prose or lengthy paragraphs. and non-chronology is kind of my trademark, i apologize for the confusion it brings.


End file.
